Chuck Norris Jokes

-Chuck Norris named his dog Stain just for the pure humor of saying "Come Stain"

-How does Chuck Norris turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? He gives the bitch a shovel.

-Chuck Norris doesnt fart. No asshole ever talks shit behind Chuck's back.

-Chuck Norris can eat a banana and make eye contact and nobody would say anything

-When Chuck Norris finds Waldo, Waldo better have a good fucking excuse

-Chuck Norris wasnt ejactulated, as a sperm cell he WALK out of his dads penis and jumped into his moms womb. Chuck Norris doesn't give any man pleasure!!!

-When Chuck Norris wants to burn some calories he lights a fat kid on fire

-Chuck Norris believes in women's rights... the right to make a sandwich

-Chuck Norris has no problem picking up women at bars. He just sits at the bar and licks his eyebrows.

-Chuck Norris needs only two words for foreplay: Brace yourself!!!

-Chuck noriss was born laughing and had 1 fist closed. he opend his hand, they found a birth control pill. NOTHING BEATS CHUCK NORISS!

-When Chuck Norris flips you off it means he wants to punch you so bad his fist has a boner.

-Chuck Norris knows how to kill a circus...
he goes for the juggler

-Did you know why Chuck Norris doesn't have a brother or a sister?
Cuz no body ever had the guts to fuck his mother!!!

-Chuck norris phone doesnt vibrate it shivers in fear

-Chuck Norris doesn't wear a seatbelt, he tells the car to hold the fuck on.

-A great mystery of the universe: when Chuck Norris puts his pants on, where does his penis go?

-Chuck norris prefers cats over dogs .. the fact that he can kill something 9 times in 9 different ways excites him